She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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