My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
