Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize
