ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Randomize
