okay pat passed out under dana's car
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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