Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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