She's JV to your varsity
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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