He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
