i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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