i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
