oh fat girl friday strikes again...
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize