His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
sex in a hospital.. check
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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