He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
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