If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
If I had your ass I would rule the world
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
