I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
