Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
