some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
