Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Randomize
