party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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