the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Randomize
