One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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