is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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