found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
