why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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