How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
