I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
