when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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