you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
