Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
May the power of my ass compel you!!
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
