Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
