last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
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