Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
