You really coming over, don't trick.
I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
