i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Randomize
