we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
