i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
