so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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