My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
