I got chris browned last night
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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