Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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