Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
i just google imaged poop.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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