My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
