i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
