God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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