Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
You can't just leave with hair like that
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Randomize
