She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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