i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
