similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
