No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
