Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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