their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
