Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
