who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
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