i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Randomize
